Barely Blink: May 2013

Monday, May 27, 2013

Google Me on Bing

Dining at a local eatery a Bing (search engine) representative walked through the door and began taking a few hurry photos of the eatery. Hold the fuck up, Mr. Gilles Bensimon. I’ve got a Barely Blink reputation to protect, which involves not being seen at a cheesy eatery.

Frankly, I’ve got an identity to protect, but I take it neither is the least of Bing’s concern, as their mission [seemingly] is to upstage their competitor, Google. I cannot imagine Bing superseding Google, but an ambitious pursuit seems warranted all-the-same.

Google has become so synonymous with conducting internet searches, so much so that I might catch a sexual assault if I were to ask a gal to Bing me, as oppose to Google me. Or, perhaps I could ask her to Google me on Bing.

Monday, May 6, 2013

Amanda Knox is Guilty!!

Make no mistake about the composed and sympathetic looking Amanda Knox. That bitch is guilty!!

Convicted in Italy, in 2008 for the murder of her roommate Meredith Kercher, a British exchange student, Knox was released in October 2011 when her conviction was overturned. Knox was originally sentenced to 26 years in prison along with her then [Italian] boyfriend Raffaele Sollecito who received a 25-year sentence for the murder of Kercher. However, this past March, the Italian court overturned Knox’s acquittal and ordered a retrial at an appellate court in Florence.

I could Barely Blink when I saw a pensive Amanda Knox, cleverly crafting responses in her head to feed a curious Diane Sawyer on ABC News. Knox has written a pack-of-lies, I presume, in a book she released this month call, “Waiting to be Heard: A Memoir by Amanda Knox.”

There is no doubt [in my mind] that Knox’s bizarre behavior in the wake of her roommate’s grisly death is due to the fact that she is guilty! Perhaps she accidentally killed Kercher over some hair spray or maybe she caught Kercher eating the last slice of leftover pizza. After all, an authentic Italy pizza is… to die for. Who knows… could be some other dumb shit! But, for whatever it was, it was enough to trigger the Jekyll and Hyde in this Good Girl turned murder.

If I were the U.S. government, I would extradite Knox’s ass back to Italy. She would have to face the consequences of her murderous actions!